Weakend

Yesterday was pretty hot for San Diego - 93 degree high with 50% humidity. M informed me that it was much hotter and humider in D.C., where we will be moving soon, but she agreed that we should still go to the movies for the air conditioning. We saw Pirates II and The Lady in the Water. That we saw two movies back-to-back is disgusting, but it was hot out, and we only paid for the first one. It was the first time I've ever snuck into a second movie, and I think that added more to the movie-going experience than the movies themselves.

Pirates was boring, and Lady was hokey, but I liked Lady. I'm a sucker for Shymalamalan. Gore Vidal can go to hell.

It's nice out today, so I'm gonna venture outside. I doubt anything exciting'll happen, but be assured you'll be the first to know.

Kevin wins again for last week. I don't have any one post in mind; they've all got something in them I like. Paul's blogging week deserves mention too.

"Random," thought Thursday.

#1
With the significant other not around, my acceptable-television standards have taken a break. Tonight, I watched a show on public access. I sat mesmerized by a train wreck of an amateur sketch comedy show, unable to rouse myself enough even to make fun of it let alone change the channel. And as I stared I realized, "That's me if I ever try."

#2
I finally got to check out the movie links that are on Bill's blog. When the movie loaded, I saw that it was going to be about Pasha, and I was a little thrilled - "Hey! I know that guy!"

#3
When the movie started playing, my speakers were off, and I couldn't hear the action, but that was okay, because as soon as it began, and he started bucking on that mechanical bull, my head was filled with his voice repeating an answering machine message of long ago, over and over again - "Wiiiilliam, it's Pasha..."

#4
Try it. You'll like it.

#5
I watched Grandma's Boy a week ago.

#6
Three days ago, I realized that one of the characters from it was the "Barq's has bite!" kid.

#7
Today, I realized that same guy was a commedian we once saw and liked on a Comedy Central special. "Nicholas! You're so strong, you should fight crime!"

#8
Then, I realized that the kid from the "Barq's has bite!" campaign was the same person as the commedian.

#9
It totally blew my mind.

#10
I'm totally gonna go watch Lady in the Water, because I want to know what that lady is screaming when Paul Giamatti carries her off. I doubt that it'll be any more intelligible, but I'm hoping context will help clear things up.

#11
#8 uses all the letters of the alphabet.











#12
Sucker.

#13
JVXUWY

#14
G'night

Screw Better Judgement

I really wanted to post it to his comments box, but I felt that would be a bit distasteful. Not that this is any better. Oh well...

Heh heh heh

Reading Lolita in SoCal

Actually, I haven't even cracked it open. I bought it months ago at a used book sale for fifty cents. I always meant to read it - it was supposed to make me smarter - but I forgot about it in all the mad rush that is my life (television, eating, etc). I found it tattered and dusty while packing up some of our stuff for the move, and I am ashamed of myself and my abandoned goals. Now I'm going to forgo all television - except Project Runway because we shouldn't make ourselves crazy - until I've finished it. But before I start, I've decided to write a little book report based on what I already know about it. If the book actually ends up the same as or worse than what I report, I'll never read another book again.



Lolita
by David Nabokov

Lolita is a good book. It was written in the twentieth century by the great Russian novelist, David Nabokov. Nabokov wrote many books in his lifetime, but they were all basically the same. Lolita is the best version.

The main character is a teacher who has a debilitating disease that makes him shake and cough. One day, he meets a young girl who is half his age, and he falls in love with her. Her name is Lolita. She likes him too, so they go on a trip together across the Wild West. In Russia, the Wild West is called Siberia, which is a cold and barren place most of the time. However, they went during the summer, so it was pleasant. On their travels they meet many interesting people, but they can't stay at any one place too long, because they are being chased.

The saddest but best part of the story is when the man has to pretend that Lolita is his daughter in the lobby of the motel so that the owner will let them stay and not get arrested. He tells her to wait outside by the bus stop, because she always stands too close to him and it makes people suspicious. While she is waiting, it starts to rain and she gets soaked. It turns out all right, though, because he comes to get her in his car, which is warm and dry.

The best part of the story is at the end when it turns out the man is a murderer but that he is sorry for what he did and only gets arrested for that and not also for having sex with an underage girl.

Lolita is a fun book. If you like stories about girls and cars, you'll love this book.

But don't take my word for it...

We're all Winners

Except for the Cubs...stupid, stupid Cubs.

Last week's winner is Arbiter Bibendi. Fool should've been blogging this entire time.

I'm tired. Who knew spending an entire weekend doing nothing could be so draining?



Stupid, stupid Cubs

And in case you don't click my links...

Arbiter Bibendi's posting again. And it's brilliant. Guy should make movies or something.

An Essay on America and Its Talent

Well, not really an essay, I just want to confess that I love America's Got Talent. I mean, come on! The yodeler and the crazy tapdancers are awesome! So far, only two of the acts have performed in these, the semi-finals, but I love them both. I have a sneaking suspicion that the gay Russian angel and the Snow White stripper didn't make it through, and, disappointing as that is, I'll totally rebel if they kicked off the flexible girl who shoots bullseye arrows with her feet.

Holy crap!!! The ventriloquist just finished, and he blew my mind!!!!

To all those people out there who hate America, I don't think you're paying close enough attention.

Zi-damn!!!

So there's no question in my mind that Zinedine Zidane is insane. Why would your first intinct be to attack somebody with your head instead of the usual punch/push? But then new information that was presented to me today has illuminated things for me. A co-worker pointed out that with his injured arm Zizou was ill-equipped to pugilize up all over his opponent's face. Perhaps a crushing head-butt was the only means of retaliation left him. But then, he resorted to it so fast...

And then it all came clear. I found an article on Yahoo, speculating on the force that is Zidane, pointed out that this wasn't the first time he's tried to destroy someone with his melon.

Five years ago with Juventus, he head-butted an opponent in a Champions League match against Hamburger SV after being tackled from behind.

He's making a habit of it! He must be stopped now or the consequences could be disastrous...

With a VENGEANCE!!!

It's been a long time. There've been lots of false starts and broken promises, but, from here on out, I begin blogging furiously once again.

I'm taking on this task for one reason: to coax Black Licorice out of retirement. And I'm gonna need your help. Through a massive campaign of shock and awe posting, we can remind her of her true calling. We can bring her back.

We have the power.